oh em hoyt

Another month has passed ya’ll and ya girl has had a good, long & busy March! Very happy to welcome April (AND SPRING!!) into the next quarter of the 2026!
I love my monthly reflections so much. Yet another one of the multitudes of positive habits I’ve formed through getting rid of BIG BAD ALCOHOL for good! It’s kind of sad to admit that my drinking had gotten so bad that when I quit, I literally had to re-invent a new way of living life because alcohol was where each day began and ended, every single day, for most of my adult life. That being said, the first year-ish was a lot of white knuckling my way through and figuring things out as I went.

Now, I am 665 days sober, and I am a long way through the course of the “white knuckle”, full on survival mode phase of sobriety. For me, this phase also had lots of “pink-cloud” moments because life sans alcohol was like breathing fresh air again for the first time in almost two decades. Yes, there were times when I was literally just winging it and struggling to get through each day because it was, and still is, starting, and re-building a new life. That being said, life these days has become much more sustainable and downright enjoyable most of the time. And it’s all because of those little habits, the small changes with the big means. Quick shout out and plug to the book “Atomic Habits” by James Clear (literally life changing read for me).

So, that has been the focus for these first few months of the year. Replacing bad habits (even the small ones that don’t seem to have much immediate impact) with good ones and also, re-enforcing the good ones I’ve managed to form through diligence and continued practice. March in particular was filled with a lot of this, along with revitalizing some foundational things, setting goals and making plans for the next quarter of the year.

Things of “noteworthy”-ness to elaborate on from a hopeful March and so much to look forward to in the next few months:

» VACATION IS OFFICIALLY BOOKED – We got our tix for DMB in Saratoga Springs – a two-day show in July. My hunnie was/is a die-hard, lifelong Dave Matthews Band fan and I’ve never been to a Dave Show so the excitement for both of us is real, for all of the reasons. I am so excited for him because this is like a dream show to go to (50th show at SPAC), for me because I’ve never seen Dave live, but also, this will be my first outdoor concert sober, and I could not be more excited about being fully present. Music is SO much better with the clarity of sobriety.
So, not only is the show such a huge reason to be excited, but we booked our Airbnb which solidified the trip and made it feel much more “official” and OMG YA’LL, this little campsite we rented is literally PERFECT.

▼▼▼ Pics of the place ’cause I am just so hyped about it! ▼▼▼

Aside from the trip itself, I’m super proud of us for having it planned and booked already. I have a screen shot in my phone that keeps jostling around that says:

“UNDERRATED LIFE ADVICE:
SCHEDULE YOUR FUN FIRST.
THE VACATION. THE DINNER. THE CONCERT. THE WEEKEND TRIP.
PUT JOY ON THE CALENDAR BEFORE WORK FILLS IT.
MOST PEOPLE WORK FIRST, & PLAY WITH WHAT’S LEFT. EXCEPT, THERE’S NEVER ANYTHING LEFT.
BOOK FUN LIKE MEETINGS,
TREAT JOY LIKE OBLIGATION.

HAPPINESS NEEDS PLANNING TOO.

The focus for 2026 is for us to really prioritize our time and invest our energy into things and experiences that make our lives full and joyful.

» HUBBY’S BDAY IN NIAGARA FALLS – Can’t wait to celebrate my hunnie in a couple weeks! I’m really excited to go explore around Niagara Falls and this is just perfect timing. We are in need of a little getaway.

» BABY SHOWER “SPRINKLE” – We officially picked a date and theme for baby Lucy’s shower and I’m excited. Mainly because for second baby it’s a little more laid back and I don’t have it in me to do a whole elaborate thing with renting a place and the whole “to-do” of it all. That’s not to say that I’m not totally excited for this one, if anything it’s going to be less stressful and more fun! Doing an ice cream theme with a full-on ice cream bar which is so cute right?!! So, I have to get going on the E-Vites, but outside of that, it’s gunna be super low-key and cook-out backyard style. Love love love! Can’t wait to celebrate little Lucy with everyone!

» WORK CHAOS – March was filled with some challenges and frustrations at the job and it almost/did end up kind of boiling over to the point where I decided to speak up and out about some concerns I was having. I have this tendency to just let things build up and fester without going through the proper channels and honestly, I think it’s out of fear of being perceived as a whiner/complainer. Or, more so, that people think I’m incapable of handling stress and overwhelm. What it mostly comes down to is that I overthink a situation so much that I talk myself out of talking about it to the appropriate people and instead end up just bitching endlessly to my husband or anyone who will listen. This is where that whole “practice what you preach” shit comes into play cause I’m always preaching about finding solutions to problems instead of just pointing them out and being negative all the time. I hate this (even when I’m catching myself doing it). So, after a lot of situationally based frustration that was compiling into bigger issues, I made the decision to initiate a conversation and although I spent an entire 32 hours in full blown anxiety about said conversation, I ended up feeling much better after it happened. In hindsight, did much of anything change? No. And I didn’t expect it to magically fix everything that was causing me grief. But, I did feel good about speaking up for myself and my team, airing out the concerns, and I definitely was wrong in assuming anyone thinks I can’t handle things. I received good feedback, felt heard and understood, and at the very least, put some of the issues on the radar of the right people. On top of all that, this was another reminder of my need for control and those nagging unrealistic expectations I set for myself and onto others that I sometimes need to get in check. I’m trying a different approach with the same amount of care; just letting things play out the way they need to which in some cases means, having to step back and let things be (a very arduous task for a control freak like Mua). So, here’s to hoping that things progress the way they’re meant to, sticking with what I know and not worrying so much about everything else.

» I AM REGISTERED FOR A 10K YA’LL – It’s official, in May I am doing my first ever 10K run at the Lilac Festival. It’s time to push my running boundaries and this ended up just timing out perfectly. I (kind of) have a new running buddy, and I jumped on her coattails after she offered up a list of the runs she planned on doing this spring/summer. I’ve been tossing around the idea of the next step being a 10K and fully intended on doing ROCovery’s in the fall so this just seemed like a “Why the fuck not?” kind of situation. I have more than a month until race day and I’ve already began “training”. I ran 5.5 miles straight this past Monday and that is HUGE progress for me. I’m super stoked about setting new running goals and constant improvement.

» SOBRIETY – MEETINGS – NEW BOOKS – THA SHOP & MORE! – I was struggling the first couple months of the year with a seasonal slump but I think like most things, a lot of stuff was inter-connected, and my sobriety fundamentals were part of that too. Tail end of Feb and March had me wanting to be re-invigorated in the “work” of recovery. I made it a point to get to my SOS meetings more regularly, managed to listen in on a couple zoom meetings with my women’s group, and started Catherine Gray’s new book “Little Addictions”. This made a huge impact – feeling more connected and inspired. Which led to feeling more invested into Tha Shop and really focusing on “the mission” there. And then the universe was like “here’s this little nugget to remind you that you’re on the right path”. I sold a bulk sticker order to this lovely person in San Francisco who runs a sober women’s group out there. And it was like “YES! THIS IS WHAT I DID THIS FOR” and so began this renewed drive to keep going with the Shopify ‘re-brand” for lack of a better term. I have such a better sense of my “why” and I’m running with it so fuckin hard. Goal for April is to have the site live and promote after that. I have been working daily on getting the site to where I want it and also creating some new products that I LOVE which includes some bundles that I’m going to be selling but also donating to some worthy organizations (cross-promotion events).

So ya’ll, that’s about enough of my monthly ranting, bragging, excitement, and rambling. I love that March was filled with making plans and laying solid groundwork for the upcoming months; so many things to keep working on and towards, and even more to be so excited about. I can feel the weather turning and with it comes an April filled with progress and promise!